Children say the oddest things

Esella country hotel is located somewhere in Namugongo Kira off Mbogo road and it is here that my sisters and I took my nieces and nephews to enjoy swimming by their pool side. I expected this to be a typical swimming date with my sisters but nothing could have prepared me for the hilarious conversations that were exchanged between them. 

It reminded me of my own time as a child, of the joys of having no responsibility and being with family enjoying every excuse to celebrate a birthday, wedding, festive season and the list goes on and on. However not to digress, we got to the hotel at about 2:40pm and went straight to the reception to pay for the swimming session and to also inquire how busy the pool was.

My Sister: ‘Hello, we would like to pay for swimming. How busy is the pool?’

Receptionist: ‘Ahh...Not too busy.’

My Sister: ‘Are you sure?’

Receptionist: ‘Yes I am.’

With this confirmation, after tucking away our receipt we rushed off to the pool only to find 25 children already in it enjoying themselves. 

As my nephews and nieces changed into swim wear we got an opportunity to observe the mayhem. I thought to myself, if not busy is 25 children running around, splashing water out of the pool, diving in it from multiple points, then what does busy look like?

Given that we had already established rapport with the swimming instructor from earlier lessons we decided to stay and let the children have fun since there was no way they were going to have a structured lesson that day. Irrespective of this drama, by 5:30pm the pool only had 4 people in it 1 being an adult who barely did any swimming. The children who had thoroughly enjoyed themselves were now tired and in dire need of food which we ordered as we waited for them to shower and change.

The entire time the waiter gave us attitude and to add to that he made an error on our large order for 9 so he had to take one plate of food back which we reckon got him a scolding from the chef. We could tell this by the sluggishness and indifference he had from that time when it came to taking our orders that aside, nothing had prepared me for the conversation that my nieces engaged in while we ate.

Just to give you some background, my niece Bella is 7 years old and has a bubbly and outgoing personality while her sister Mary is 11 and is an introvert (she is quite the novel reader). Bella interrupts the adults’ conversation with an outburst.

Bella: ‘Eh my throat is hurting mummy.’

Mother: ‘Hurting….,where.’     

                                                 

Bella: Here, no here,’ she said as she quickly pointed at her gullet.

Now seeming concerned with her daughters persistence, my sister began to examine her throat only for Bella to remove her hand and respond.

Bella: ‘eh… when is the food coming, my throat is hurting?

Mother: ‘let us be patient,’ responded her mother as she grinned once she finally realized that the pain in her daughter’s throat stemmed from her hunger.

Now the waiter I mentioned earlier, had informed us that our orders would take 20 minutes but we waited 40 minutes instead which was why Bella was so hungry that her mother had no choice but to distract her.

Mother: ‘ahh but Bella, alright go watch your brother maybe your throat will stop hurting.'

But Bella was not having any of that and amply responded with a rebuttal.

Bella: ‘somebody has spoilt the air."

Mother: ‘How?’

Bella: ‘bad air.’ (By this Bella meant, someone had passed air - farted)

Mary: ‘hahaha’

Bella: ‘I cannot stop talking.’

Mary: ‘Chatter box.’

Bella: ‘senior chatterbox.’

Mother: ‘Hey, let’s eat,’ she yelled to get these 2 sisters to let go of the bickering since the food had finally arrived.

15 minutes later.  

                                                        Bella: ‘Am full, take this food away.’

Mother: ‘Bella, you are eating like you are storing food for another day. Ehh’

Mary: ‘Are you going for the hunger games.’ (The entire table burst into laughter)

I was amazed and somewhat proud at the well selected and served rebuttal from my niece who is clearly a lover of all things literature. 

The rest of the adults at the table could not believe the madness unfolding between the children as we remembered how young and innocent they once were while reminiscing on our own childhoods. I enjoyed myself so much that when the bill finally arrived, even though it was wrong, nothing could wipe the smiles off our faces. 

We asked the evidently annoyed waiter to revise our bill without the double billing for the swimming and headed home smiling after payment.

Tips for Esella Country Hotel

Swimming: do not go on the weekend and especially when the school term is in recess. If you have flexible work schedule it is best to go in the afternoon during the week or make a reservation for an appropriate time.

Food: is on the pricy side for the usual dishes where a plate of fries goes for 10,000 and fries with chicken 20,000

The toilet floor was wet and dirty the time I was there especially given the number of children swimming that day.